


Tinted Windows

by Evangeline_Douglas



Category: American Dragon: Jake Long
Genre: F/M, Mental Anguish, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-12-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:40:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,375
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26754436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evangeline_Douglas/pseuds/Evangeline_Douglas
Summary: Jake had always thought that after he found Rose, they'd grow up and grow old together, live happily ever after. For a while, they did. But sometimes, more often lately, the demons come back and he finds himself walking a razor's edge between happily ever after and something else entirely.
Relationships: Jake Long/Rose | Huntsgirl
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Reposted from FFN. This is a slightly different version of the prologue as AO3 doesn't allow me to use the same formatting, so a lot of the meaning was lost without some minor tweaks. 
> 
> For anyone new to this story, it started as a little fic inspired by Tim McGraw's song, Tinted Windows (definitely a deep cut. You aren't likely to stumble across it on the radio). I strongly recommend a listen. Some of the lyrics have been put into this prologue. After multiple requests, I turned the dinky oneshot songfic into a longer exploration of how the events starting from Homecoming would have affected Rose long-term. Chapter 2 will be posted soon (I've written and posted 8 chapters which are already on FFN).

He had tinted windows in his first car.

There had been something to be said for the old Pontiac, rusting away at the fenders and wheezing through a dying six cylinder engine. He couldn't fly everywhere.

They used to park out by the reservoir.

Luke smiled as he rubbed the cloth over the hubcaps, willing the rust of his own first car away.

They had the water, radio, and the stars. Never had to worry their friends would come knocking on those tinted windows.

The young man watched his father, wrestling under the hood with the shredded belt. The first streaks of gray were beginning to work their way into his jet hair. "Was that where you proposed to Mom?"

That diamond looked good in the dashboard light.

At 17, Luke had heard the story often enough. Especially since Ava and Kyra were always begging for Mom and Dad to tell it again, encouraged by every hopelessly romantic friend they brought home. But things were changing. They always did. Mom had been distant, talking about the Huntsclan. Their deaths. Her guilt.

"Come on, son. You need a new belt and a quart of oil." Jake tossed the boy a set of keys. "You can drive the 'Stang."

.

"Ear of the dragon." Luke pressed himself against the crack in the door, straining to hear the voices.

"We were so young, Jake."

They sold that car when they were twenty-seven. Should have got fifteen, but they only got eleven. "You can't change the past, Rose."

"Jake, it's too much. I can't live like this anymore."

"What's too much? You did the right thing, and it was twenty-five years ago. It's time to move on."

"If I had killed you, the Huntsman would have told me the same thing."

"Rose, you're not comparing me to him. You're not."

"I don't know what's right or wrong anymore."

"Baby, please. We'll get through this. I promise. You promised."

"What?"

"You promised you'd be okay. Remember?"

"But you didn't let me go."

"I did, Rose. I let go, and then I wished you away."

"You came back for me."

"Most women would fall all over a guy for that." Silence. "Maybe that was the wrong thing."

"You think?" Bitterness twisted off her tongue. 

"Look, I'm sorry, okay? But what's done is done. We'll work through it together. You're going to be okay. I promise.

"Face it, Jake. You can't promise that. You can't promise anything, now. We're all grown up."

.

They grew up and they grew apart, the years rolled by, and now her eyes are tinted windows. He wants to believe somewhere inside she's still in love with him. He keeps looking, hoping to see it through those tinted windows.


	2. Regress

She can hear him call her name, frantically desperate, and she's about to run out after him with his jacket (because what would she do with it, anyway?). But the picture catches her eye and when she sees her own face, her birthmark burns and memories slam into her like a freight train.

"I wish Rose had never been taken by the Huntsclan."

The words pound in her head as she studies the picture: his suit, her dress, his cocky smile, the happiness in her eyes, the fraying around the edges and the little hole in the center where the folds meet, as if he's held and folded and refolded and unfolded day after day after day.

"He was telling the truth."

Her parents don't have time to say anything. Her feet pound the stairs as she races to her closet and finds something, anything that feels like her old second skin. They don't have time to ask her where she's going as she bolts out the door, and she almost entirely forgets they might want to know. The Huntsman never cared where she was, so long as it wasn't consorting with dragons. 

```

Her heart is blasting through her chest and she lands hard on one knee. It's clear she never physically trained for this, but she is Huntsgirl, apprentice to the Huntsman, born to hunt and slay dragons. Dragons. Without them her life was normal, without them she'd never be a murderer. No, don't think like that. This dragon is evil, this dragon is evil, this dragon is evil, not the rest, just this one--

Her name cuts through the noise. She ignores it. Everyone is outside. They've abandoned her here--dragons are liars--no, don't think like that. Then, everything is dark.

She wakes to a red dragon struggling to lift a massive pillar off her leg--This one isn't evil, calm down, Huntsgirl, none of them are evil--and he's beautiful. It's no wonder the Huntsman wanted his skin. No, quiet, quiet.

```

Rose kisses him, and Jake kisses her back under the moon. She remembers how intensely she loved (loves?) him. His black eyes bore into her soul and see everything good, and only good, and his touch tells her how deeply he loves her. There's a soft smile on his face and the moon lights his face, and he's so good and selfless and wonderful but she's a murderer. He pulls her back for another kiss as the others leave them, and she lets him. Monster. You don't deserve him. Unless he's the monster. No, no, he's beautiful, he loves you.

But she is Huntsgirl. Evil. Not evil. You never killed anyone. She'll never be what he wants her to be, never live up to his vision of her. Still, she loves him, and she has to try, so she climbs up on the pedestal he's built for her, and she prays that she never falls off.

It's a long way down.

```

Her parents demand an explanation before she goes to bed. The morning after, she's changed. Two pasts fight each other in her head, and she's wracked with guilt for something she never did. By the time she's dragged herself out of bed, nursing her aching muscles and throbbing headache, it's nearly noon. There's a giant red lizard in her living room posing awkwardly for her sister.

He perks up when he sees her. "Ready for lunch?"

In truth, she'd forgotten they had plans, but she smiles and nods anyway. 

Remy, her sister, protests that he can't leave, she was just getting the texture of the scales right, and couldn't she just finish the painting before he goes? The dragon--Jake-- dissolves into human form and grins. "Yo, just take a picture."

And Rose feels familiarity wash over her that numbs the burning confusion, just a little. She can make it through lunch.

```

She makes it through the rest of the week. Jake is so wonderful, so kind, so forgiving. He saved her life when she gave it up, so selflessly. Rose has her real (fake?) life, and it's perfect. 

Jake doesn't think so, he couldn't, but Rose can't help but feel she owes him. All he wants is the love of his dream girl, but he was willing to let her go. And he did let her go. Maybe it's his turn to be happy, even if the price is hers to pay this time. She can live with that.

It's tricky, balancing on this pedestal, but he loves her and for now that's enough because she loves him too.

```

It's quiet at home when he's gone. Her parents are unsettled but not all that tense, considering the circumstances. Remy paints more realistic dragons than she used to, but everything else is much the same.

Except her.

Rose has changed.

Because Jake's last words in her other life boom in her head, but even larger, even louder, are her own last words.

"I wish for the destruction of all Huntsclan."

That echoes deep in her soul. She hears it when she's alone, sees the ring of skulls and the Huntsman's face and the dragon's face in her dreams. She feels the cold crystal on her fingertips with everything she touches, sees the green eyes in the faces of everyone around her.

She's surrounded by people. Real, imagined, villains who never existed, loving family. But she's alone, the bad guys are defeated and the good guys have gone home.

So where does that leave her?


End file.
